Abiding

My dad is your classic bird watcher, you know the type. He’s always jotting down in his bird book, every time he spots one he’s never seen before. It amazes me, his ability to name them off the top of his head, without the crutch of a reference book in hand. When I was younger, I loved to walk in step with him, down the jungle paths. He had a great knack of point out birds that my trained eye couldn’t hope to see alone. And often he would say, almost joking like, but which isn’t as far from the truth as you would think is this - that God placed him in Papua New Guinea, because he had run out of birds to study in America.

Now I wouldn’t classify myself as a bird watcher at all, but these last weeks, I’ve found myself looking up at the tree right outside our window. These two mourning doves have been quite busy building their nest. They are preparing it for spring time and the baby birds that will abode in it. It amazes me, in all weather, one of the bird’s sits perched up on the nest protecting the eggs (remember I am not a bird expert, so I am just assuming momma bird’s laid her eggs already), incubating them and keeping them safe from the elements.

One morning, I flipped open my bible to Psalm 91, one which I am very acquainted with. I’ve read it many times, but in that moment, I really let the words sink in.

“He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High, Will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord, ‘My refuge and my fortress, My God, in whom I trust.’ (v. 1-2)

And then it goes on to say in verse 4,

“He will cover you with His pinions, 

And under His wings you will find refuge”.

I immediately thought of two things. First, I glanced up to the mourning dove, sitting perched up on the high branches, settled over her eggs, shielding them from the wind with her wings. Then I realized the word “abide” has been popping up a lot lately in my life. I quickly flipped in my Bible to 1 John, where I’ve been reading, and soon found the word “abide” mentioned more than a few times! I get so excited when different parts of scripture match up, especially when it seems as if it is just by coincidence. Although, I soon discover it is not by chance at all! God is speaking directly to me.

These last few weeks just plain exhausted me. We’ve all had those weeks that just lay us flat. A series of unfortunate events might lead you there, or the weight of life could suddenly knock you down with such great force! With no warning at all, you are left feeling desperately alone and overwhelmed by your lot in life. I have often tried to echo Paul’s words in Philippians – “I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound in any and every circumstance” (4:11-2). But friends, I haven’t quite reached that ability to lean on God’s strength in everything yet. I find myself often placing my trust in my own strength, and that’s why when my feet slip from under me, I fall so hard. And I don’t know why it is, but I do this a lot. I refuse to make God my dwelling place. He stands there always, with open wings, ready to shield me from the changing circumstances of this world. And I sometimes choose to turn away. I decide to try things on my own, with my own strength. But He’s always there when I come back, exhausted, limping, empty without Him.

Good thing God is not like us. When we so easily change with the circumstances of this life, He remains the same. He doesn’t just decide to leave us. He doesn’t ever get distracted. He doesn’t grow weary. He doesn’t have days where He neglects His children. God is ever faithful and always present! But we are like those little mourning dove eggs, so prone to cracking, so prone to being harmed by the things of this world. We desperately need a Father who shields us with His might outstretched wings. Oh, that I would learn to not trust in my own strength, that I would learn to trust in God’s strength. Weak empty self, come and abide in Him. Linger awhile and do not depart from those great protecting wings.